Random Stories

A conversation with Ava about healthy food:

Ava - "You know how you can tell if a food is bad for you, Mom?"

Me - "How?"

Ava - "The food will taste way good.  Like way better than fruits and veggies."

I had to laugh, because she's so right.  Pretty much anything that is bad for you will taste really good.  Unless it's pork rinds.  Blech.  I think I bought some when I first moved out of my parents house, probably in rebellion of my mom's mostly healthy cooking.  If only Mom and Dad knew I was buying pork rinds, boy would they be surprised.  This will show them!  Some girls date boys their parents wouldn't approve of, I just bought food they wouldn't approve of.   

Brig and I recently got new church callings in our ward.  The sunday we remembered to wait after church to be set apart was a busy day for the bishopric.  There were at least four people ahead of us.  Brielle had no patience or reverence for such events.  She went about her business babbling and climbing on the furniture while we waited our turn.  When it was my turn she finally decided to sit still.  She climbed up on my lap and was quiet while they blessed me.  Toward the end I felt a little tiny hand reach up and lay it on top of the men's hands.  It was so cute.  We all laughed as soon as the blessing was over.  I have a feeling if she could wear pants to church...she would!

There is a commercial that plays on random channels that makes Ava cry.  It's the ASPCA one.  It shows various dogs and cats shivering, looking scared and a few that have been disfigured.  It talks about how you can save an animal from abuse.  It lasts at least a minute but seems longer.  Ava covers her eyes and yells, "Turn it, Mom!  It's too sad!"  Afterwards she will say, "We've got to go and adopt a dog right now.  A poodle.  We have to, Mom!"  I like how she turns the sad commercial into an opportunity to get that poodle she's always talking about. 

I'm loathe to admit this, because I've been ridiculed for it before, but Ava and I love watching Finding Bigfoot.  It's about a foursome of researchers that consists of three believers and one skeptic.  They travel the United States investigating eye-witness accounts and trying to find the elusive beast.  It's the sort of show that my dad would pull an eye muscle on from rolling them too much.  Brigham refuses to watch it with us.  Party pooper.  Anyway, the other night when Brig was working Ava and I ran across a show on animal planet called Mermaids: the Body Found.  It was what I thought was a documentary about a couple of scientists from NOAA that decided to come forward with what they knew about mermaids as a real species.  Okay, listen I'm sure you're all laughing right now, but for half the documentary I was like Why didn't I hear about this before?  This is huge news!  My first hint that something was amiss was how attractive all the scientists and researchers were.  Not saying scientists can't be attractive (Hi Hubby!) but these people were like actor and actress cute.  Ava and I spent an hour and a half, mouths agape that this news could be real.  Ava went to bed scared.  The CGI mermaids they showed were a little frightening looking.  I got online and started looking for more information.  Jokes on me, the "documentary" was not even a real documentary.  Rather the whole blasted show was a fictionalized faux-mentary speculating on what if a group of ancient australopithecus (half men/half apes) split from what would become our ancestors and instead of heading inland, took to the sea and evolved to survive and thrive there.  I felt like a fool.  I'd been tricked I tell you.  I told Ava the next morning and she was outraged that they would put something "fake" on t.v.  P.S. I still believe in Bigfoot.  (Call me, Bobo!)

Brielle's become a midnight/1 a.m./ 2 a.m. snacker.  Last night she woke up at 1:45 and said, "Hungy.  Hungy." This has happened once or twice before.  I got her a piece of bread and water and then she wanted back in bed.  I mean it only takes ten minutes out of my night but it's driving me crazy.  I'm going to try to get her to eat a bowl of cereal right before bed time to stop this from happening.

I got hired on permanently at Boys Are Cussed, or something that rhymes with it anyway.  Before you congratulate me, know that it was like winning a swim meet where the competition consisted of flying birds.  I met a lot of interesting people over the holidays.  A girl with genetically weak teeth.  Another girl with restless leg syndrome that is so violent that it rocks her stepfather's car at stop lights when she rides in the car with him.  A boy who never stopped humming to himself.  Another woman who had ten kids and was only five years older than I am.  She was very sweet.  She told me that her mother called the hospital after her last one and told them to tie her tubes.  Oh dear.  She also wasn't thrilled with working in a store that was frequented by rich white mormons.  She transferred to West Valley City's store.  A boy who liked to say "...and $#it." after every phrase.  "Hey Denise, where does the Thomas Train Cars and $#it go?"  Another boy who seriously looked twelve.  When he asked me where to find something I thought he was a little kid looking for a toy and then realized he was helping a guest and dressed in red and black the same as me.  Anyway, I will be in the cash office counting the deposit like I did for Lowe's my last few years there.  It's a good job where I can come in in the mornings count the money and leave.  Just me and all that filthy money. 

One of my goals this year is to eat better.  I found myself at work this morning, starving because I used the time to eat breakfast for doing my hair and makeup.  So I dug through my purse and found a half of a symphony bar.  So for the first breakfast of the year I had six sections of milk chocolate and a mug full of water I brought.  Nice.