Smooth Away: Denise Buys,Tries and Cries.

If you are a fan of infomercials you may have watched one about a product called Smooth Away. Now I did not order it off of t.v. I bought it from Target for $10. I decided to whip it out last night and try it on what I believe is my exorbitant amount of peach fuzz on my face. I know, what a dumb thing to be self conscious about but I can't help it I am. So I follow the directions and begin rubbing the patch clockwise three times and then counter clockwise another three times. Um, no luck I am not getting any off of my face. The instructions said to not rub too hard. Hmm, that's rather subjective. What's too hard? So I decide to just give up and I put it back in it's box waiting to be used maybe on my legs sometime in the future.

Here's where things go horribly wrong. I woke up this morning and decide to give that peach fuzz the heave ho. I pull out the Nair for faces tube and decide I can handle the sick smell if only my peach fuzz is annihilated once and for all...or at least for a few weeks. I rub it on and try not to notice how my daughter is staring at me wondering why I'm putting on Daddy's shaving cream.

In five minutes I walk back into the bathroom to gently remove the offensive peach fuzz and the offensive smelling Nair. As soon as the water hits my face I know that I've made a mistake of epic proportions. OUCH! Where I had tried the Smooth Away, which by the way is just glorified sand paper, which is about half of my left cheek and the top of my left upper lip it is burning something fierce. I recall a scene I saw from an old film version of The Phantom of the Opera where he got acid thrown on his face and I cringe. I run upstairs and pour some milk into a bowl and proceed to dip cotton balls into it and apply them to my chemically burned face. This was the advice on the Smooth Away box if irritation occurred. Okay, things are calming down. I go down to rinse my face again and the burning persists. I gingerly apply my facial lotion and swear off makeup for the day. As of now my face is still red and my signature "Cindy Crawford" mole is not looking too great. Which by the way, is about all Cindy Crawford and I have in common. What if it falls off?!? Painless hair removal my foot! Although I'm pretty sure that it was never meant to be used in conjunction with Nair. I definitely won't be using it on my legs, let alone any "sensitive areas" . Yikes!